The Apprentice Is Back

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2009 Apprentice UK - The Crew

One of my favourite TV programmes started again last night – The Apprentice with Sid James (aka Sir Alan Sugar). My wife and I sat down, cup of tea, bowl of fruit salad, TV on – waiting to be entertained and we were!

15 (“should have been 16 but one person bottled it” said Sir Alan Sugar) desperate hopefuls bitch their way to win a job with Sir Alan.

Would you want to work for him?

By the way, if you have yet to see the programme and you do intend to…stop reading now…I reveal who gets fired.

This year there’s a mixture of hard worker’s, do-er’s, look at me I’m on TV, poseurs, know-it-all’s and maybe one or two just ordinary individuals.

Oh yes, and the 15 are the best brains in the country.

We are in trouble if they are.

Give him his due, Sir Alan did say’ Some of you are good with words. I know the words to Candle In The Wind, but it doesn’t make me Elton John’. That created a laugh.

I do like this quote…I’ve seen many individuals have great careers because they can talk well..know what to say and when to say it – especially if someone important is willing to listen. They never did a hard days work (grafting) in their lives but they talk well and go far.

The First Task.

Cleaning.

Buy a load of cleaning materials and devices and get out there cleaning and make a profit. “Off you go”.

Remember – make a profit.

Some of the 15 applicants looked down their noses…I don’t do cleaning. “I’m a high rising Manager, you know”.

The girls team leader – Mona. I though she did OK. Delegated some tasks and worked with the majority of her team.

The boys team leader – Howard. Manages 10 pubs and therefore should know how to get the best out of people. He didn’t get the best out of them…but this is rather different…all those egos wanting to be top dog.

When will they learn…win and you won’t be fired.

At this stage, working as a team, communicating and listening will produce winning results. None of this “I know what’s best” attitude.

They had £200 to spend on their cleaning materials. The girls team were out to spend the lot. Not because they liked cleaning…they liked spending. They had forgotten the whole purpose of the task…to make a profit (i.e. spend as little as you can get away with). They spent £196. Anita was put in charge of the calculator and was told to do the sums, said “Well done, girls. We spent the budget wisely”.

Maybe a ‘firing’ quote which may come back to haunt her.  Nick the squealer (One of Sir Alan’s right hand men – the other is Margaret), gave Anita one of his famous ‘Lemon faces’. You have to see one!

The boys – “we only need some water” – spent £107.

John Terry?

Philip got stuck in straight away. He’s going to be the do-er. The hard grafter. Can’t understand a word he says…but he will work hard. Looks like the Chelsea player, John Terry (don’t know if that is a good or a bad thing).

So what did they end up doing. Mainly washing cars. Both teams started well. Made a few phone calls to car dealerships and ‘won’ contracts to wash their cars. Simple really.

But it looked like they had never washed a car in their lives. The girls didn’t know how to use the equipment.

It took 5 boys 90 minutes to wash one car. 90 minutes! And they soaked the inside as well. They didn’t realized you have to shut the car doors when you spray water on the outside of the car. Inept or what?

I do the inside and outside of mine in 30 minutes and that’s on my own.

The Ice Maiden

Debra one of the team leaders blamed her team for being puppets. Wow, she was the Ice Maiden of the 15. Didn’t care what she said, who she said it to…but very lucky to survive. If she takes on board Sir Alan Sugar’s advice…she could be one to watch and go far.

The boys won…all because they spent less on their materials and cleaning devices.

So, the girls ended up in the boardroom…fighting, spitting, bitching, talking all over each other. Great to watch!

The calculator expert, Anita. Fired and gone.

You knew it was going to be Anita who was fired. She was in charge of that calculator and when she overspent and didn’t speak up…she was going to be ‘hosed’.

Next week, it’s all about cooking for parties. Another hard-graft one with the addition of face to face customer service.

Can’t wait until next week…

Who’s your favorite?

Did Anita deserve to go?

Who will win?

Share your thoughts…

Oh, I forgot to mention, the best quite of them all:

“I’m a rough, tough cream puff” – Kimberley